My girlfriend awoke to find herself possessed by an evil spirit. The first thing I did was call an exorcist. He couldn’t make it until the evening, so we waited. She threw things at me, cursed my name, kept trying to strangle me, and wouldn’t let me kiss her. Really she was the same as ever, but at least she was no longer hellbent on bankrupting me and making me look inadequate in front of everyone. I started to prefer her this way. When the exorcist finally arrived, I sent him away. I told him it had been a false alarm.

From Anthology and a hundred other stories